Horace: It’s not fair, why do I have to have the "Z" bed, G?

Vincent: Because you can’t be trusted with the big beds, especially after last time.

Horace: Aw, c’mon, G! Granted, the barbecue sauce was a little stupid, but-

Vincent: I don’t want to hear the story of "Horace and the King Size midnight snack" ever again! It makes me ill just thinking about the entire thing.

(Brian Adams comes out of the joining room)

Adams: Will you guys relax? We’ve gotta share a room together so we may as well get used to it.

Vincent: Why are you here, anyway, Bri? Why aren’t you at the Mariott with Bryan Clark, now you’ve got that Kronik thing going?

Adams: You see, Clark and me aren’t all that close outside the ring. The whole Kronik thing was his idea. I don’t really like the idea of "Cashin’ Checks and Breakin’ Necks" That causes a lot of bad vibes, man. Us scientologists…

Stevie (from the bathroom): Sucka, will you shut up about that damn scientologist stuff!?

Horace: You OK in there, Stevie, you’ve been in that bathroom for twenty minutes.

Stevie: I’m fine…must have been that food I ate.

Vincent: That will teach you to have that "Texas Steak"!

Stevie: Yeah…well..that was the only thing on the menu I liked, Vincent.

Vincent: Hey…I’m not doubting that, cowboy!

Stevie: YOU DAMN LUCKY I’M NOT OUT THERE TO GIVE YOU THE SLAP-JACKING OF YOUR LIFE, MAN! SUCKA, I’M FROM THE STREET AND YOU KNOW THAT!

Horace: Slap-Jacking?

(Norton walks in wearing his NJPW Heavyweight Championship belt around his waist in his evening clothes)

Norton: I’m back, guys!

Adams: Where’d you go, Norton?

Norton: oohh…just for a walk.

Adams: With your championship belt on?

Norton: ….yeah.

Vincent: Norton, I think everyone now knows you’re the NJPW Champion.

Horace: Yeah, especially that guy sat on the table next to ours.

Norton: Hey, he looked over at me, so I presumed he wanted to meet the Japan Champion!

Horace: He didn’t look at you, we were sat next to the salad cart, his wife was getting some salad.

Norton: Yeah…well, we had a nice chat. I think it must’ve been that food he had cos he and his wife both went to the bathroom and never came back.

Adams: …

(Toilet flushes and Stevie Ray walks out with his slapjack in his left hand. Horace pulls out a copy of the Ren and Stimpy comic and begins to read it.)

Vincent: …you take you Slapjack into the bathroom with you?

Stevie: Yeah..when you live on 110 Street, you can damn near get attacked anywhere!

Vincent: So have you ever been attacked in a hotel toilet before?

Horace: I nearly was once. But luckily we were called to go eat before Meng could do anything.

(everyone stares over at Horace who doesn’t look up from his comic)

Stevie: Sucka, we didn’t wanna hear that!

Norton: I’d never share a room with Meng in the first place.

Adams: …on a different note, who’s had their contracts picked up by Shane McMahon here?

(everyone goes quiet)

Stevie: What you talking about, Sucka?

Adams: You know, Shane McMahon now runs WCW?

Stevie: What? Ithough Bischoff was back!

Adams: No, he doesn’t. The last Nitro was held a while back and Shane –

Vincent: The last Nitro!? And none of us were invited?

Adams: ermm..no. Well, I wrestled a dark match, and –

Stevie: Sucka, why didn’t Bisch call up the now for one last dance.

Vincent: Geez, that really sucks.

Norton: I think I was in Japan at the time anyway…winning my title (hee hee)

Stevie: Shut up Norton!

Adams: Hey, we don’t need to work for the new WCW anyway!

Vincent: I take it your contract wasn’t picked up?

Adams: ermm..I’m in negotiations.

Stevie: Hey, they don’t deserve us anyway……Aww..damn! I need the damn bathroom again!

(short silence)

Vincent: So what happened on the last Nitro, Bri?

Adams: Well, Booker T won the WCW title again.

Vincent: (deliberatly out loud) Gee..that makes him FOUR TIME WCW CHAMPION! Wow! WHAT AN ACHIEVEMENT!

Stevie: (from bathroom) Listen, sucka, it could have been either one of us getting that push. It’s just that…Booker was there that day.

Vincent: Actually, if you were there I can see them giving you that push…AND getting over with the fans!

Stevie: Really?

Vincent: Yeah! I mean, look at The Undertaker, Shawn Michaels and Steve Austin. They all got over and THEY were from Texas as well.

Stevie: That’s tru-…Hey, WHY IS IT THAT TONIGHT YOU’RE DISSIN ME WHENEVER I CAN’T REACH YOU TO GIVE YOU A SLAP-JACKING!?

Horace: There’s that word again…

Adams: Hey, do you reckon Booker T got his contract picked up?

Stevie: Oh for sure. If he did, I know my brother’s gonna get me in on the act as well! Imagine it – Harlem Heat in the WWF!

Vincent: I thought you kicked him out of Harlem Heat? What’s the matter: you had a fall out with Big T?

Horace: I haven’t seen Big T in ages…where did he go?

Stevie: Far away from me I hope! Damn, that Ahmed Johnson sucked as a tag team partner. I saw footage of him in the WWF and he looked awesome! What the hell happened?

Vincent: It was part of a gimmick Russo had planned for you both. He was gonna be a buffalo and you were gonna be Bi-

Stevie: THAT’S IT DAMMIT! YOU’VE PUSHED ME NOW!

(Sound of a toilet flushing is heard and Stevie comes out swinging his slapjack. Suddenly there’s a knock on the door. Stevie looks around before answering it. A tall, good-looking woman is at the door)

Stevie: Hello there, baby! How are we tonight?

Woman: Erm…hi…is Scott in here?

Stevie: (taken aback) Scott? Scott NORTON?

Woman: Yeah…is he in?

(Norton walks toward the door with a swarve look on his face)

Norton: Jessica…hey there.

Jessica (giggly): Hi Scott. Listen, me and my friend Katelin have a bottle of champagne over in our room at the Mariott. And, we were wondering if you were interested in celebrating your big win over at our apartment.

Norton: I would be delighted. C’mon, let’s go. See you in the morning, guys!

(Norton walks past Stevie, puts his hand around the woman and walks up the corridor. Stevie is staring out the doorway in shock)

Jessica: Hey, who was the guy in the room with you?

Norton: Oh, just a traveling aquaintance. Don’t worry about him, he’s from Texas.

(Stevie Ray slams the door and walks back into the room with a look of bewilderment on his face)

Stevie: Did THAT just happen?

Vincent: (also shocked) Hot DAMN!

Adams: (shocked as well) Holy…

Horace: (runs into the joining room) BAGSY SCOTT’S DOUBLE BED!!!!!!